Wednesday, June 29, 2005

My Mother - 19 Years Ago

Today, June 29th, is the 19th anniversary of the passing of my Mother. The memory of that day is still as fresh as if it was yesterday. Bear with me as I tell this story today. I was on Active Duty for Training at Ft. Benning, GA, and it was a Sunday. Ordinarily, I would get dressed and attend church in Columbus, GA, but early on that morning, I told my roommate that I was not going. Instead, I tried to go back to sleep. I seemed to be in a dreamlike state between consciousness and deep sleep. In this state, I could see a shipping container for a body but could not see who was in it. It left me troubled.

Later that day, someone knocked on my door and yelled that I had a phone call at the pay phone. As I walked toward the phone, it's receiver dangling by the steel cable, I knew it was bad news of some kind. My Mother had been diagnosed with colon cancer on Valentine's Day and the doctor had informed my brother and me that there was nothing he could do. We were asked the toughest question I ever had to answer in my life - "do you want any resuscitation if she stops breathing." We cried as we said "no"; she was in such excruciating pain.

On the other end of the phone was my brother, tearfully telling me that Momma was gone. I don't know that I have ever felt grief like that before nor since. It is like feeling your heart is trying to burst in your chest. You gasp for air that burns your throat. I LOVED MY MOTHER! We were not a family to express emotions, and I don't think I ever said it to her. I only hope that she knew by what I tried to do to make her proud and to live up to her expectations, her hopes and dreams for me.

The funeral was on July 2, 1986; I went back to Ft. Benning on July 6th and threw myself into my training to ease the pain. Nineteen years later, the pain is still there, just under the surface, dully pulsating. It never goes away because her love for her sons outlasts her presence on this earth.

Dear Momma,
Your last question to me in the nursing home (200 miles away from our hometown) was "am I home yet?" Yes, you are. I know that you and my younger brother are reunited safely in the arms of God. I love you and I miss you.
Your middle son

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Sex Quiz

Since I am traveling this week and next, I will try to post some interesting stuff from fellow bloggers. Therefore, my first one thanks to no4real4real is the ¨Sex Quiz.¨

1) How would you describe your sex role? Top, Bottom, or in the middle?
2) How old were you when you first had sex?
3) Was it straight or gay sex?
4) How long did it last?
5) Do you remember his/her name?
6) When was the last time you had sex?
7) Where did you have sex at?
8) When was the best time have sex, early morning, afternoon, or late night booty call?
9) What is the first thing you notice about someone you are attracted to?
10) Second thing?
11) Third thing?
12) Have you ever participated in group sex (group being 4 or more)?
13) When was the last time you participated in group sex? Never 4 or more...
14) Which is better, being watched during sex or watching sex?
15) Have you ever double dipped? (had sex with more than one person at separate times in one day)
16) Have you ever faked an orgasm?
17) What is the wierdest sexual request someone has asked you to perform?
18) Did you do it?
19) Have you ever had sex in public and where?
20) What is your record number of orgasms in one day?
21) Would you rather have great sex with an ugly guy/gal or ok sex with a hot guy/gal? Okay sex with a hot guy (you can train them)
22) Would you ever tell a lie to have sex with someone?
23) How would you rate your sex life on a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being the best?
24) Do you know how many sexual partners you have had sex with?
25) Finally did you think about having sex after taking this quiz?

Ok. If you want my humble opinion on Passion Marks, stayed tuned. I read it last week and it is awesome. My next reading will be I´m On My Way by Christopher David. Get it, read it!

I know I should post my answers, but my excuse is that I am on a timed computer in Seville, Spain and will post later. Besides this keyboard is screwy.


Thanks to my agency's generosity, I am currently traveling in Europe. I will blog about it when I get back to the states on June 25. Meanwhile, hold on to your dreams, your dreamboat, and your nuts!
One love.

Thursday, June 09, 2005

First Shout Outs

I arrived at this point through the works of some serious authors whom I want to pay homage to. First and foremost is my frat, Rashid Darden. Rashid is da man and I want everyone who reads this blog to go to his Old Gold Soul website and order Lazarus. You ain't seen nothing yet. This brotha has got a future. Check out his diary, too and the photos are slammin'.

Then, check out
Alphonso Morgan's book, SONS. Some of y'all have had the same thoughts as Aaron, so go read it. Those of you who are Sha wannabes can read up, too.

Get your hands on Lee Hayes' book
Passion Marks. If you see yourself as Kevin or James, then seek help! Much love. Lee did a book reading for my Cousin and several of his friends, so he is really approachable (shout out here to my cuz who is also my heart).

I can't say enough about
Keith Boykin except you gotta read Beyond The Down Low for yourself. Now that's for real (with all due respect to my brother no4real4real).

There are many more up and coming authors, and as I read'em, I'll tell ya. Stay in touch, and y'all come back now, ya hear.

Peace and One Love.

First Run

Ok. Now that you're here and I'm here, let's begin this journey. I don't know where we will end up, but at least we will have fun getting there. This blog is called "Seasoned" because that is what I am - probably twice y'all ages - LOL. Anyway, I will bring a different perspective and hope you can keep up. As Bette Davis said, "you had better fasten your seatbelt; it is going to be a bumpy night."